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1

bless the chill of twilight days

it's all you've given me

one foot in daylight

one foot in perpetual night

do I name you Necrophiliac?

a ghost is what you see

loving only what I was

not what's become of me

 

it may have been a clouded thought

or poorly chosen words

but while this rainy game plays on

a lunatic has stirred

you say you laugh at shadows

you say you're sowing seeds

your halo says you're with me

your parasite disagrees

 

so now kiss the black seed

that you put into me

lay your dirty hands down

absolve me of my sanctity

heal me of sanity

and set the jailer free

let me twist you just a little

break you just a little

leave your head just slightly haunted

you said it's what you wanted

 

so now kiss the black seed

that you planted in me

lift your thieving hands up and

receive the fruit of all you

have done to me

for the branches of the wormwood tree

hang heavy with your legacy

thank you for choosing me

 

2

didn't you ever learn

some things will burn you?

didn't you ever learn

some wheels just don't turn?

 

if he had another dream

maybe he'd want to play

as it stands he won't come out

won't come out today

the shadows grew so long

I thought they'd pull me in

still hearing other voices

in the autumn wind

 

was it a strange tune

that played inside your mind?

is it just a phantom

or is it by design?

 

sitting here in my corner

hidden in the eaves

wanted to catch the sunbeams

and the falling leaves

and the falling leaves me

here like this for years

that breeze right through in minutes

still I sit right here

 

let me introduce myself

I don't know who I am

I don't know what I'm doing here

in this barren land

wonder if I'll grow old this way

those doors open so slow

time it flows so quickly

and I have nowhere to go

 

didn't you ever learn

people will burn you?

didn't you ever learn

some worlds just don't turn?

didn't you ever learn?

 

3

awaken my will

cry "rebel" aloud

there are giants in the clouds

a new heaven and a new earth

another boring dirge

for the death of innocence

no recompense

doesn't make sense

 

this is my penance - dementia

I like to spend my off days

sleepwalking around

trying to feel my way out

but the labyrinth always wins

cry "extrication"

cry "ascension"

cry "redemption"

but the world always wins

 

these are the gory days

Gardens of the Lost, Sheol

Nether Regions, U.S.A.

I like to spend my off days

rafting Acheron

like it was the Shenandoah

sounding the depths until

up jumps Leviathan

smiling "come out and play"

"no, you're the devil - go away"

these are the gory days...

 

(yes, I know I'm babbling...)

 

I thought I heard yesterday

staring at the waves

whispered words in the wind

saying I was saved

saying that they've called off the holocaust

and everything's okay

maybe someday

I can come back out to play

maybe someday...

 

4

calling out across a sea

of sunlit roofs to you

calling out across the fields

of jesus green to you

put a message in a bottle

if you hear me

and toss it into

the sky so blue

'cause when I listen to the wind

it says a little prayer

and when I think about grey eyes

something sighs high in the air

and when I say your name aloud

I see a ghost

drift amidst the clouds

 

and watching leaves of brown

falling down the sunny day

dance around and love the ground

so far away

somewhere just beyond tomorrow

there's a happy place

look away to the horizon

look away

look away...

...and when I say your name aloud

I see a ghost

way up in the clouds...

 

5

baby blue eyed

lazy tiger-striped

fire child divine

it's been a long time

met you in a dream I had once

long ago in august doldrums

radio daydreamed you

and sleepy sunbeams painted you

all grass-stain skied and sad eyed

somewhere beneath a distant sky

walking right beside

you came down through

your years with a sigh

all the big people

passing blithely by

and only God up in the sky

had time for you

and the day that God died

how you sat and cried

I saw it all

felt it all too

you see

I was right beside you

all the time

 

now sundrop raining days roll by

ivory towers reaching high

treehouse bees

all summer breeze-blown

cavalcade of lemonade shade

and I am there with you

recognize me now

recognize me

 

all far and away in your eyes

lazy jesus in the sky

oh why

and where have you gone to

this time...

 

6

for one frozen beat

there's a place we can meet

look for me

look away out your window

and stop the tick-tock

dragging us away

and stop the wicked clock

from stealing all our days

let me tell you a story

as miles away you lay

with the dream slayer

let me tell you a fable

whispered in your silent places

jesus made this heart for you

but you will never claim it

 

I saw us in a dream

we were like children

we were green and we were holy

alive and forever

but this is just a dream

woven between two heartbeats

and this can never be

 

7

scrape off this old canvass

wipe away the colors

now I've wasted all this time

peel away the ages

burn all the pictures

start the story over

and tell it right this time

what a sad mistake to make

chasing rainbow gold

now I look back on it

all I get is cold

you can't fathom how much

I regret every day

I threw away

on you

deep velvet

 

days of the pentecost

all this was lost

go ahead and burn it

it's taint within my veins

turn the skies formaldehyde

a crease upon my brow

this decree it ages me

and nothing is the same

and things that kept me green

now just make me mean

I don't want you here no more

to start another war in me

you've turned something cold

at the very core of me

you've turned the world

against me

set the hands of time working

against me

and all because I let you in

all because I played the wind for you

you just played to win

and I just want to begin again

without you

deep velvet

 

8

one night could stretch across aeons

one candle's light could reach across oceans

your body could be made of wood

your body could be made of satin

 

your bride died before she made the altar

your groom is too weak to stand beside you now

so who's to blame when glory's flame

burns the temple down

 

the war is over, the dark side won

but we sure had a lot of fun, right?

and who's to blame when glory's flame

burns heaven down

 

9

shall we careen through the park

or go wading with the sharks

you call the shots

and I get shot alot

there's something singing in the spray

or on the radio

saying don't go in the sand

tomorrow

but it's okay baby

if there's broken glass in the dunes

you build your sandcastles too high

for me to climb up to

 

don't go in the sand

tomorrow

don't go in the sand

tomorrow

 

there's a very fine line

between heaven and hell

this I know now

all too well

it's a little secret

smothered lovers never tell

there's a very fine line

between heaven

and hell

 

10

echoes in the wind

of my invisible friend

you know no one believes it's true

when I talk about you

oh, you'll dance with the bogeyman

you met in my closet

you'll play with the monsters

under my bed

you'll hum along with

the music I hear

in my head

but you never smile for me

and you'll only let me

see you

once in a blue moon

and then

only to pretend

my invisible friend

 

you'll dance with the devil

in the pale moonlight

you'll tell every dark shadow

it'll all be alright

you'll be the best friend

of a mad screaming ghost

but you won't

let me get close

and it's getting close

to the end

my invisible friend

 


A Southern Californian of origin, I currently reside in Huntsville, AL. (a.k.a. "Rocket City"). Most of these "poems" actually began life as song lyrics, although some simply begin with me putting pen to paper in an attempt to capture the ephemeral.

I use words to clarify. I find that the use of metaphoric imagery can help one to make sense of things. Finding the right word or concept to use as an analogy can help a person to get a better handle on problems. It gives one the power to name what has remained nameless and elusive in his or her life.

I tend to key off of imagery a lot, images that come from all sorts of places from dreams to memories and images of childhood, visions that, for whatever reason, have retained some kind of power for me. It's all about self-empowerment, the ability to encapsulate and record life experience in a way which is anti-logical and, thereby, more subjectively meaningful.

E-mail Derek Marlow at:

dtmarlow@hiwaay.net

Visit Derek's web site at:

The Dreadnaut Chronicle

The above poems are © copyright Derek Marlow 1999. They may not be copied or reproduced in part or in total without prior permission of the author.


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